Friday, February 19, 2010

Plastic Surgeon

Had a pre surgery appointment yesterday. I do NOT understand these people who say they are addicted to plastic surgery. I was not a happy camper. First thing he tells me is he will see me in 4 or 5 months to start the procedures. ProcedureSSSSS? Maybe I'm just naive but first, I thought three months, max, and u go have some new puppies popped in, the end, you are through. OH NO. A month after surgery I start chemo. When that is done, I can go get extenders. For those of you who know all about this feel free to skip ahead. When I get "extenders" I go every week or two and have more saline injected until they get "big enough". At this point he tells me he will have to use the biggest ones they make on me, gee thanks, and that they will hold about a liter of fluid EACH. Holy saltwater batman. Am I gonna slosh when I walk? When they are finally "topped off", I get to set around with those for a couple of months. THen comes the second surgery where these will be removed and the implants put in. And not just implants. CADAVER SKIN. Because my skin will not be thick enough after mastectomy to provide good coverage. eeeewwww. I didn't ask him to make sure it was from a Christian as I wanted all of me going when the rapture happens (I did tell Clayton's surgeon that about his bone graft, though). Figure the boobs will be "left behind" anyway. Anyhoo, wait 4-5 months before getting started, 4-6 months to fill er up, 2 months with full extenders, get implants, and 6 months after that before nipple reconstruction via a skin graft. Once more, eeewww. That sounded painful. And if I want to wear fake ones during all this time, they cost four freaking hundered dollars A PIECE, price does not include pocket bra to keep them in place. If anybody out there has some they aren't using anymore....

5 comments:

Joanna said...

Whoa! All that for a new rack? Is it wrong that I laughed that they'll be left behind?

Too bad I couldn't give you some extra skin.

Dianne said...

No, i thought it was funny. I am really into shock value these days. The poor bag boy at the local grocer will never be the same. He made the mistake of asking how i was. I told him I had been better and he started in, yea me too, blah blah blah. I looked at him and said " I'm having both my breasts cut off on Thursday". The look? PRICELESS

EmmaP said...

i am sooo laughing at the check out boy. wow. my neighbor works at the hospital... something to do with inventory and supplies and ordering... blah blah blah. but when the implants expire on the shelf, he throws them away (or brings them home and gives them to the neighbor for some good old fashioned white elephant gifts!!! lol)

Good luck, hun! Praying for you!!!

Dianne said...

does this mean my boobs will expire?

RhondaLue said...

I didn't know boobs expired. lol (mine are looking that way but still..)

Just found your blog after reading your comments on emma's. So sorry to hear of your diagnosis and what you're having to go through. Prayers for you! May God hold your hand as you walk through this trial.